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my best friend and housemate Pat McAdams (fingerhead) died this afternoon, right in front of me.


Oh my god, Grubi, I'm sorry.
thanks, Shawn. I appreciate it.
This is terrible news.

I am so very sorry.
thanks, Bee. I appreciate the sentiment. you would've liked Pat.
oh god. i am so, so sorry.
thank you, Brandi. he was a hell of guy.

I have no words.
thanks, Johan. he was a guy would've gotten along with famously. he was involved in some fandom here in the States.
What the hell? I'm so sorry to hear that.
i'll have more detail soon, Alan. i'm trying to find the right words.
I watched a stranger die once, and it was quite traumatic. I can't imagine experiencing that with a best friend. Are you okay?
i'm not doing so well right now. I keep wavering between shock and sorrow.
I heard the news. My sincere condolences. I'm in shock and devastated.

I'm Deb, he was a bridesmaid at my wedding in New Orleans a few years ago.



To all of those who have enjoyed this site and this community and the friendships that grow from it, I must bring you news that no one ever wants to hear or bear. I am Fingerhead's (Pat McAdams) father, and I learned Saturday night that Pat had passed away suddenly in Tallahassee Florida. The shock and grief, and yes even anger, that I am experiencing I know will be shared by his unnumbered friends and admirers.

Pat was a caring, creative, funny, warm and outgoing human being who excelled at one thing above all others. He always found a way to make others smile, and to stimulate them to think about their lives and world a little differently.

I'll never be able to fill the hole in my heart that his passing leaves, but sharing my grief with others gives me strength. Please join me in wishing Pat a safe journey wherever he may be, and always remember his smile and his open heart.


Best friend

See my reply to Deb
I very sorry to hear this. Sincere condolences.
Thanks so much. I am also relieved to hear you have found a renter for the old house.

My name is Marisa and I worked with Pat for three years at Davis Kidd in Nashville. I hope you don't mind my popping in here to pay my respects. He was a dear, dear man and all of us who knew him loved him deeply.

I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now with everything going on, and you have my deepest sympathies. If you don't mind my asking, would it be possible for you to email or post any information about the arrangements you might have, even if its just to direct me to another person? I wouldn't dare to bother you with it if I knew a soul else to ask. You could email at amwhitsett *dot* gmail *dot* com if you would rather not post anything here, etc.

I'm so sorry for how you must be feeling. I assure you, you're not alone.
As soon as I have something concrete, I plan to post it on my site as well as his.

your friend

I just read your sad news. My best wishes go to you and Pat's family.

Re: your friend

Thank you, Kim. I appreciate that.



My name is Amy and I worked with Pat and Marisa (below) at Davis-Kidd.

We had a special, exclusive patty-cake clap when we saw each other at work, he's been over to our house many times, and rebuilt my computer into a take-over-the-world Frankenstein. He wrote a dinner party murder mystery a few years ago that was hilarious. (I "did it" :))

I have his tinsel Xmas tree in my basement, and he still had a few of my computer games THAT HE NEVER GAVE BACK when he moved :)We went to lunch one day and I had fish tacos - I was never sicker in my life.

I tried to get him a job where I work now, teaching graphic design, and I wish they'd hired him.

Pat had skillz with puns. I loved being foolish with him at work. He told me some of his sorrows and got absolutely giggly when something made him especially happy.

He happened into the biggest, most gas guzzling car I've ever seen, for free, and then couldn't afford to drive it to work, so we gave him rides all the time (he would have done the same. I bought some of his books to sell online, and let me say, that was the messiest apartment I've ever seen :))))

He loved the author Joshlyn Jackson and wanted to marry her (she's married)- we went to dinner with her twice. He always picked weird and funny books for his staff picks, and could tell you any lyric from any song at any time, whether you wanted to hear it or not.

Pat will always be in the next room, writing something creative and laughing at his own jokes.

I hadn't talked to him in a while, but I've been talking to him now. Patty-cake to you my friend, I love you.

Please let us know what happened when you feel like you can do that. We don't know anything here in Nashville. We're all thinking of you too.

Re: Pat

He wrote a dinner party murder mystery a few years ago that was hilarious. (I "did it" :))

I was the voice of the radio announcer for that murder mystery.

he still had a few of my computer games THAT HE NEVER GAVE BACK when he moved

I have a few computer games he had in his possession. If you are going to the memorial, I can give them to you.


Almost a year later and I think of our Pat often. Just looking him up, and saying hi to him and his friends:)
here it is a whole year has passed and still its very hard to believe Pat has left this world I have faced many deaths of close personal friends immediate family and still I believe Pats is the hardest to swallow rip brother we love and miss you


I heard awhile ago...

I heard a year ago through my mother that Pat had passed. I was shocked and saddened. We knew each one another during our clumsy teen years at Grissom HS and later worked together back in the mid-90s at SCI in Huntsville, AL. Pat was a completely unforgettable person! I was always impressed with his love for life and creativity! I'm so sorry for your loss.


May 2012

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